Spending all day inside studying is a lot easier for me when it is winter, ie dark, cold and generally unpleasant. But it is weeks like this one that make being trapped at a desk seem like punishment. It is summer time in the southeast and beautiful out. Not too hot yet and clear blue skys. I am trying to find balance between studying for my boards and being a new mom. When I am with Everett I am worried about studying (ok to be honest he makes me smile so much I can easily forget about everything else in the world) and when I am studying I feel like a bad mom. Right now I get up at 5am and feed him and we play a little. Then from 8-12pm I study at school. As soon as 12pm hits I rush home to my smiling little boy and immediately wrap him up in my arms. I really cant get enough of him. The lunch hour flies by and then we do it all over again. Going back to school and leaving him is so hard but I feel so lucky every time I get back home. Today we sat on the porch and giggled while we practiced our superheroing....
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Friday, May 24, 2013
this moment
{this moment} - "A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see."
happy first mothers day
i woke up mother's day to a squirming everett and the smell of pancakes. not a bad way to start the day. my wonderful husband got up early and made mother's day blueberry pancakes, veggie sausage, and homemade whip cream. our first mother's day was really nice. although i spent much of the day studying i did get to cuddle with everett in the morning, have a fantastic breakfast and go for a hike with my man. not a bad way to spend the day.....
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| beautiful flowers from my wonderful husband |
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| Sweet boy, practicing his smile for mommy:) |
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| my little boxer |
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| first mother's day roses from my sweet little brother |
| my everett measuring 23in at 6weeks! growing like a weed... |
Saturday, May 11, 2013
this moment
{this moment} - "A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see."
....but i couldn't pick just one:)
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
wrong amount of knowledge...
As a medical student I know just enough to scare me. When something seems off I immediately go to worst case. It seems that part of being an actual doctor means getting to a place where you know when to worry and when to leave well enough alone. My pregnancy happened to coincide perfectly with our reproductive block in school. We learned about the thousands of things that can go wrong during each of the stages of your babies development and all of the ways your labor can take a turn for the worse. I would text my husband almost daily during classed in a complete panic begging for another ultrasound. Yes, I said another because I had insisted on several. For example, a babies intestines spend several weeks growing outside of the stomach and at about 10weeks when there is enough room for them go back into the stomach hopefully that is what they do. SO at 10weeks I had to make sure that our little ones intestines were exactly where they were supposed to be. Thomas said ultrasounds were supposed to be a fun exciting event but he would spend the entire time stressed because he knew I was inspecting every inch of our baby for something to be wrong. I would count vertebra, and ventricles, look at heart valves and chambers and still no peace of mind. When Everett was born I cannot even begin to describe to relief to see his perfect little form. Growing a person is an unbelievable thing. There are countless ways for things to go wrong that are completely out of our control and only one way for them to all go right... and they do! Most of the time everything goes exactly as it should and this still blows my mind. So today when our sitter casually mentioned that Everett had not really had a good bowel movement my mind immediately went to the various forms of GI obstruction that occur in newborns. So far Everett has been the king of bowel movements, for him to go most of the day without one is unusual. I had to fight the urge to call a friend who is one of the best pediatric critical care docs I know and insist on abdominal imaging. Luckily I made no such call because with a huge grin Everett filled his pants like a champ. Leave it to my boy for his first real big smile to be a "haha mom here is that poop you wanted!" Hopefully someday I will have enough knowledge to know when not to worry....
Here are some pictures of us working on our smile. Sorry they are a little fuzzy we were too excited about our farts to stay still!
Here are some pictures of us working on our smile. Sorry they are a little fuzzy we were too excited about our farts to stay still!
Saturday, May 4, 2013
this moment
{this moment} - "A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see."
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Burns, party of three!
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| 39 wks and ready! |
When I went in for my 39wk OB visit I told the doc I was ready to have this baby. The man and I had spent a couple of days hiking around at home (the mountains of western NC) & my spring break was ending on Monday. I needed to be able to settle in and start studying for the first step of my medical boards in July. Not to mention by this point I was feeling huge, needing to run and ready to reclaim my body. The doctor told me we would wait out the weekend and if I had not had him then we would talk about inducing on Tuesday. Having a plan and feeling like I knew when the baby would come was very appealing to my need for scheduling and organizing, just not knowing when he would come was really making me crazy. On Friday night we went to the movies and made fun plans for the rest of the weekend, including fancy easter brunch at American Grocery Restaurant in Greenville, SC.
At 2am on Saturday morning I started having what I told the man was stomach cramps. I had a stomach bug a few days before and was convinced this was just more GI distress. Yes, I was in total denial. By 6am I was still having stomach pain when Thomas looked at me and said "seriously Jamie, stomach cramps every 6min? Can we please call the hospital?" I reluctantly agreed. Being a medical student I was terrified of going to the hospital and telling them I was in labor only to have them tell me I was actually just having gas. I will be rotating at this hospital in the fall and did not want to be the future doctor that does not know the difference between contractions and gas! When I talked to the on-call nurse she she said "so you are due now and having contractions every 6min? Yes, you are probably in labor and can go ahead and come to the hospital." I still was not convinced but I told her we would start to make our way there. With the hospital being so close to our house I did not feel very rushed yet. At this point the contractions were not very intense. Instead of rushing to the hospital I asked Thomas to vacuum and clean the kitchen. If we were going to have a new baby I did not want to bring him home to a dirty kitchen. Funny the things that go through your head in those moments. 2hrs later we made our way to the hospital. On the drive over I told Thomas we should go through the Starbucks drive-through because it would be a while before he would be able to get a cup of coffee & food. Little did I know at the drive through window I would have my first serious contraction. When the girl handed Thomas his coffee and said his sandwich would be a few minutes, it was all I could do not to yell at her that we were in a rush! Finally at 9am we made it to the hospital. We were put in an evaluation room where they decide if your labor has progressed enough to be admitted to the hospital. Normally you are in this room for about an hour. After first hour the nurse came in and explained to us that we had not been admitted yet because I was having contractions but not cervical changes, which is the definition of true labor, having both contractions and dilation. Also she said the baby is not moving as much as they would like for him to be. They asked when my last meal had been and I could feel Thomas roll his eyes at this. I am, admittedly, really bad at food. I do not eat regular meals and I can go a while between meals, I just get distracted and forget. When we told the nurse the last time I ate was 6pm the night before I could feel her holding in a laugh. "Of course your baby is not moving very much, your blood sugar is too low!" She brought me a giant orange juice that I gulped down and it felt like junior started doing jumping jacks. After 2 hrs in this room the nurse came back and said if I had not started to dilate they were going to have Thomas take me for a walk. This was the first, and only, time that I laughed. The distress on Thomas' face at the suggestion of taking me for a walk, while I was curled up in a ball sobbing, was priceless. He is too nice to say it but I could see him sending mental messages to the nurse of 'I dont think so' or 'are you for real?" I have never begged, literally begged, to be admitted to the hospital before. Thankfully this time I was in fact actually "in labor." Up until this point I had said I was not going to have an epidural, I know everyone has an opinion about pain management during labor, after having been in the situation I will have to say to each their own. At this point I would have agreed to anything that would lessen the pain, I honestly did't think I would make it through the rest of the day and then still have enough energy to push.
By 11:30, having been admitted and transfered into the delivery room, the nurse anesthetist came with the epidural. I told her she was my new best friend. I even think I said I was going to quit medical school and be a pharmaceutical rep for epidurals. By around noon when the epidural kicked in, it was a different world. Basically, the epidural made my body not hurt as much, without affecting me mentally or making me feel drugged in the least. For a few hours, we were in our nice cozy delivery room watching the NCAA tournament. Eventually the nurse came in and told me were going to start pushing a little, so I did. A little while later the doc came in, and said "looks like this baby will be here in about 20 minutes." Sure enough, that's about how much longer it took. Little Everett came out kickin', eyes wide open, and ready to go. We were blessed with a healthy, beautiful baby boy.
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| 40wks |
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